iTiming

I was just down at the *U*Village. I went into the Apple store. I went in fully intending to purchase an iPod Shuffle. But they don't have the iPod Shuffle sport strap. Which one would need if one wanted to go running with one's Shuffle. And since that is the primary reason one is buying the Shuffle, one declined purchase at this time. They will have the sport strap, excuse me Armband, in "five to seven weeks."

If they can cram 120 songs into an object the size of a stick of gum, would it have killed them to coordinate release of a stupid nylon strap in the same 6-week span?! I walked in WANTING TO DROP $99 and I didn't. That's poor marketing on someone's part. Somewhere a marketing person should be bashing his or her expensively coiffed head into his or her desk. WTF?!

clothes

A couple of years ago, when I was required to wear "professional attire" to work, I had this idea that I would buy a sweater vest or two in neutral tones to wear with long-sleeved button-up shirts. I like button-up shirts, but they take me a LONG time to iron. I'm sort of stupid at it. So I thought if I could wear a sweater vest, I could get away with ironing just the sleeves and the collars, and no one's the wiser to my wrinkly torso! But alas--at this time, the fashion world had not caught up with my time- and labor-saving idea, so I went on mostly avoiding wearing button-up shirts and gravitating towards knits and sweaters, which do not require the iron.

Then what ho! A few weeks ago at the local GAP outlet, a cute black crew-neck sweater vest. Paired today with a green/black striped Old Navy button-up shirt, my ensemble got a positive comment from fashionista coworker a mere 15 seconds inside the door! I do feel that I'm dressed pretty sharp. But it feels almost wrong. I made a point of wearing jeans, because if I'd worn slacks or khakis, well, that just would have been too drastic. It feels almost wrong to be attired so well. Usually I just wear a T-shirt bearing some inane expression, such as "BANDITS," "Alaska is for players," or "Kiss Me, I'm American." I don't know if my spirit has caught up with the trappings.

my boss is weird

So I woke up with a sore throat, kind of a headache, fatigue, that brain no worky feeling, and considered calling in sick. But I didn't.

Then there's my boss.

ME: [boring words telling boss what caller was looking for on our website]
BOSS: Give it to me, let me work on it.
ME: [gratefully hands post-it to boss]
BOSS: [with a straight face!] OK, I feel like I'm going to throw up, so I'll work on this for a while, but I may go throw up.
ME: ...
ME: Well just don't throw up on the paper, in case I have to take over for you.
BOSS: Oh, I won't, I'll throw up on my computer.

the short list

And now a still-not-comprehensive list of my basic passions in the "recreational activities" category:

Making scrapbook photo albums (my style is relatively minimalist)
Quilting
Bikram’s yoga
The dharma, though I am an infrequent meditator! Aiee!
Running
Hiking
Eating—I love good food!
Traveling
Golf

Enjoy the weekend, Marmotines!!

Disclaimer Plus Things the Nice Marmot Does NOT Like

[NOTE: It has come to our attention that several things the Nice Marmot thought it was OBVIOUS she liked were left off our last entry. (Yes, that's the Royal We in the previous sentence.) So the next entry will be a brief list of activities (and only activities!) that the Nice Marmot really likes. Some of these have already been discussed in this space, but in the name of completeness, the Marmot abides.]

The New York Yankees
Confrontation
Misspellings
Incorrect grammar
Incorrect punctuation
Poorly written text
Fallow real estate (ie, a piece of land or a storefront left idle for more than three weeks)
Hurting people’s feelings
Going on a trip and forgetting her pajamas
Barbecue sauce, especially when artificially distilled and used to flavor other foods, like “chips” and “nuts”
McDonald’s
Not knowing the answer to a question
Satellite-linked missile defense systems
Gory or violent bits in movies
When people don’t go to the dentist or the doctor for long periods
Croutons (when I was a kid, we fed stale bread to the ducks; we refrained from putting it on our salad)
Raw tomatoes, except when sliced thin and consumed in a sandwich, or maybe Roma or grape tomato varieties
How freaking fast she (herself) walked down the aisle at her wedding
Split pea soup
When she lacks energy
Wearing contact lenses
Stupid loud Americans in foreign countries
Being behind someone in line at a store who is verbally abusing the clerk
Twinkies, Ho Hos, Ding Dongs, poofy pies, Donette Gems, or any other Hostess or prepackaged “bakery” product
Having to ask a coworker to move his/her car so she can leave the office
Low-rise jeans
When a person with long, poofy, untethered hair prepares her burrito
Hip-hop songs where all they talk about is s*e*x
When both her pairs of jeans are in the wash
Tanning beds
When the laundry hamper overflows
Poker, especially when televised, or any other card game besides cribbage
Ignorance, especially in herself
Colored contacts
Poorly planned, homogeneous suburbs
When people crack their knuckles
When people neglect to use their turn signal
The Grammies (I think I threw in the towel when Steely Dan won.)
Steely Dan
The Eagles (except for Hotel California, natch)
Hearing someone crack his or her knuckles
Sitcom couples where the wife is a gorgeous, thin, prepossessing woman with large bosoms and the man is an unkempt, unattractive jerk
That Rachel got together with Ross at the end of “Friends”
Chapped lips
Rat-tails, mullets, etc.
Forgetting her sunglasses
Coffee
Gum
Carbonated beverages
Poorly constructed websites
Stupid car/truck decals, ie “Cowboy Up” or when the copyright-infringed Calvin is piddling on ANYTHING!!!
When her coworker turns around 18 times in five minutes, inhibiting her websurfing
The bathroom at work
UV rays
Star Trek Voyager
Black olives
Thatching the lawn
How she feels after reading People or Us (shallow and dirty)
The Price Is Right
The local TV news (“THE LETHAL DANGER LURKING IN YOUR HOME!”) and fear-mongering in general
Gambling
Heather-gray clothing
Losing things
Overdrawing her checking account
People younger than she accomplishing great things (that list grows longer by the year!)
Evian
Licorice
Martinis
Bargaining
Toothpastes not approved as decay-preventing dentifrices by the American Dental Association
When Susse reminds her of some bozo from high school she has not thought of in ten years
Balancing a checkbook, keeping a check register, or worrying about money
People who humiliate their partners in public
Vaguely or possibly Christian-themed businesses (ie, New Dawn Espresso—just put a Jesus Fish on the sign if that’s your thing!)
When her MSH goes away and she cannot fall asleep
Spoons that got caught in the garbage disposal and cut up her lip
White tic-tacs
Subscriptions to weekly publications (always behind! always behind!)
Dennis Miller now that he is a right-wing extremist (very bizarre)
Banana Runts
Not being able to find a parking space
Taking her car through automatic car washes
Valances
Wall-to-wall carpeting

Things The Nice Marmot Likes

(I have to post this now because it was getting TOO LONG!!! I was getting obsessed. The sequel is coming soon. This is not meant to be a comprehensive list, but the aim was to list a few things that you might not be aware of even if you know me.)

Lists
Bus commutes
Cherry blossoms
The Fremont Classic
Homemade pie
Winning
Hardwood floors
Sharing food
Bags
Getting things done on the weekend before 9 AM
Cold cereal with milk
Quiet
Christmas
When her boss says: “Excellent, Smithers!”
Hand-forged doughnuts
Being correct in a matter of spelling, grammar, punctuation, or geography
When anonymous donors put fatty checks in the Salvation Army bucket at Christmas
Providing useful information
“The Big Lebowski” (duh!)
Good rapport with coworkers
Plants
Libraries
Her hairdresser
Dark Chocolate (Dove dark, Special Dark or MOST ESPECIALLY Nestle Truffon sold only in France)
Cheese
Stringed Instruments
Wind Instruments
Voting
“The Music Man”
Kitties, also puppies
Preplanning events
Spontaneous events (no, these are not mutually exclusive; I can like them both!)
Raspberries
Holding babies
Board games
Cupcakes
Nectarines
Most things about MSH, too many to list here (another post, perhaps)
Weddings
Cribbage
Monday Night Football
Raw green beans
“Deadwood” on HBO
When her sister says cynical and world-weary things
Making people laugh
Messy workspaces
Wordplay
Running
France, French food, the French language, and the French
Jeff Bridges
The Oscars
Season changes
Singing the Happy Birthday Song to people on their birthdays
Bodies of water
Mints
Getting massages
Pasta
Hot chocolate with peppermint Schnapps
Opinion polls
How the New York Times refers to people as “Mr. Annan” and “Ms. Thatcher,” etc.
Sushi
Lying on her back daydreaming
Travel
Comfortable shoes
Kalamata olives or those big green olives, especially when stuffed with garlic
“The Simpsons”
Country-style hash browns as prepared by her grandma
Bright colors
Wheel of Fortune
Paying with exact change
Taking walks
The clearance rack
Clean teeth (and therefore, her Sonicare toothbrush)
Her Stitch’n’Bitch circle
Fridays
When MSH goes to a professional to have his hair cut
Lewis Black
That the woman who runs the charity for abandoned babies in LA won the lottery
Parallel parking
Vanities (the piece of furniture)
Malt-O-Meal

The head that was removed from Manar had been capable of smiling and blinking but not independent life, doctors said.

This news story is so sad, yet so fascinating to me. (There is a more current story on Yahoo!News, but the one I linked is the one I read first.)

The...extra head could blink and smile. It could smile. Which suggests emotion--it could presumably see, some things made it (her?) smile, while others did not. Cognition, discrimination...Was she a sentient being, this head? Severely physically challenged individuals have abbreviated or largely useless limbs, but they are surely sentient beings. I am not saying the extra head should have been left attached--doing so would have harmed or doomed the fully developed baby, I would assume. In another vein, if they're joined at the brain, what kind of things do the two minds share and communicate? (if only we could properly investigate...)

It's just, you know. That life, profoundly different from the kind of life most of us experience, "strange" we would call it, hopefully not painful, short, and mysterious. There must be a Shakespeare quote that's apropos here, and I can't summon it.

the O.C.

My favorite part of lastnight's episode was Seth being all sleep-deprived and creepy in the school lounge. Especially when he freaked out that yellow-shirt who sat down after Zach.

I just want Seth and Summer to MAKE OUT!! Also I want to pinch Summer's cute lil cheeks.

That's all I've got on that episode. IT's sunny here and I want to be outside. Have yourselves a wonderful weekend!!!!!!

updates

The Timbuk2 bag has arrived. The ballistic nylon colors I selected are not as they appeared to me on the website, but luckily for me (as there is a 15% restocking fee on Build-Your-Own-Bag bags) the effect is still quite pleasing. I can't wait to throw all my crap in there, along with my yoga clothes and a snack, and hit the Road.

Lastnight I went to Sonic Boom Records and the Fremont Book SHop before dharma class. Cuz nothing makes the Buddha happier than spending that cash before meditating! I bought ($7.99) Mountain Con "Dusty Zeroes Dirty Ones." Dig this: it is THE BOMB!!! I am horrible at writing about music, but trust me, you should give them a listen. Super-saturated guitar sound and fun lyrics (often shouted). Apparently they've been compared on previous albums to Sublime, but I don't hear that on this one. They are a local band and I heard them on KEXP.org and that's a fact!

Also at Sonic Boom, I purchased a cap-sleeved T-shirt for $9.99. Sahweet! It was manufactured by American Apparel, sweatshopfreemadeinUSA. Sahweet! again. But last week I purchased a similar American Apparel T, but not cap-sleeve, from Victrola Coffee. It was $18. This would suggest that Victrola is adding a hefty markup to their T's. Doesn't make me love my T-shirt nor Victrola Coffee any less, but I'm just sayin'. Word to yo mutha.

apropos of lip balm

http://www.kevdo.com/lipbalm/home.html

protective lubricant: sealed for her safety

I just bought some shredder lubricant for the shredder at work. It has a seal at the mouth of the bottle marked “SEALED for YOUR PROTECTION.” Is it really for MY protection? It’s more likely for the protection of my shredder, right? I think they mass manufacture bottle seals for all manner of products at one factory and mark them all with that saying, just in case it’s something to be consumed by you or your loved ones. We’re protected! We’re all protected here! OK, thanks.

that thing they say about art and life...

Mischa Barton, AKA Marissa on "the O.C.," is dating Richy Rich heir and sometime actor Brandon Davis, WHO WENT TO NEWPORT HARBOR HIGH SCHOOL!!!

Happy Valentine's Day! :)

a retail haiku

on tenterhooks i
await ship confirmation:
my timbuk2 bag

Kissin' and Tellin': the O.C. Redux

From NYT, Teenage Girls Lift Soapy Drama From Slump, 1.25.05

"Comparing the two adolescent melodramas, 'One Tree Hill' is certainly homier than 'The O.C.' Where the plot of the more popular 'O.C.' is over-the-top, and its tone is snarkily self-conscious, 'One Tree Hill' is emotional and earnest. 'It doesn't talk down to the audience,' Mr. Janollari said. 'The sound of the dialogue is authentic.'"

That's why I LOVE it, because it's snarkily self-conscious and OVER-THE-TOP! Lastnight’s episode was no exception. Seth’s sleep-deprived, caffeine-fueled love-me rant? Totally over-the-top! Sandy and Rebecca’s kiss? Too over-the-top to be believed! (That whole plot line—I just don’t buy any of it. They’ve made so much of the strength of Sandy and Kirstin’s marriage that I’m all: don’t want to hear it. The kiss was so unrealistic.) By the time we got to the much-hyped HLA (hot lesbian action), it was comforting and almost anti-climactic.

It’s hard to know what to think of Marissa at this point. She sometimes appears shallow and disingenuous and, as they never cease to remind us, prone to heavy drinking at all hours of the day—sometimes this is a joke and sometimes it’s DANGER WILL ROBINSON! DANGER! I suppose they could play off her relationship with Alex as just another way to rebel, and I’m sure Julie Cooper* will see it that way, especially in light of DJ— and won’t THAT be a juicy scene! However, I feel (and this is a credit to Mischa Barton’s acting, probably) that there is something genuine there, even if it is, and the writers and director are at great pains to emphasize this, exploratory. Perhaps it will lead Marissa to herself? I think she’s a bit lost.

LEGAL DISCLAIMER REGARDING THE FOREGOING: I am a hetero woman, have few lesbian friends, if any, and am in all ways unqualified to discuss the political and cultural implications of lesbianism, so please take me with several grains of salt. I feel like they’ve treated the Alex/Marissa relationship in a relatively realistic way. Many depictions of lesbians and lesbian relationships in the media tend to play toward the hetero male fantasy scenario: any woman could take it into her head to lock lips with another woman at any time! HLA! But it isn’t anything serious, and doesn’t threaten her relationships with male characters. I’m generalizing here, of course, but in my INEXPERT opinion, the ramp-up to Marissa and Alex’s romance rang true. We saw genuine desire on the part of Alex, and Marissa, although tentative, was definitely flirting. You go, girls!

What is Summer’s deal? She clearly senses Seth's feelings and she GAVE him an opening, which he didn’t take. Doesn’t that indicate an openness on her part to dumping Zach and getting back together with Seth? If that’s so, why doesn’t she just sing it out loud and dump Zach anyway? Why settle? Although it would make me a bit sad to see Zach get dumped; he's really growing on me. That whole boyish enthusiasm. Gotta love it. And Seth is just getting super-angsty and almost whinging, but hot as ever. (the Nose-Graze last week was HOT HOT HOT!!!) I was not sorry for him at all in that empty bus. He is a Pooper McGooper and he put the kibosh on the comic book! Geezy Pete!

All in all, a darker episode. You thought: Valentine’s Day, they’ll wrap it all up with a cute little bow, just like at Chrismukkah. But we didn’t really get much resolution. We got Ryan relinquishing Lindsay to Poopy Caleb for the evening (an olive branch, WILL IT TAKE?!) But no dice for Kirstin and Sandy as she shuts the door and relegates him to the Cold Comfort of the Couch. I’m not scared, writers, Kirstin won’t give up so easily, but Sandy is going to have to do something BIG. Not withstanding my current anti-Valentine’s mood, if my husband cheesed out of our Valentine’s Day Date to “bid farewell” to his first love, I’d be MAD.


* Did you not HEAVE when Caleb Nichol called Julie Cooper JuJuBe? I’ll never touch another one in my life.

cool fun survey

I turn to you, dear reader for your opinion on my latest bodily dilemma: chapped lips. They're very chapped, and this week they're cracking and bleeding. MSH claims this doesn't make him want to kiss me any less, but that is pure bunkum, because chapped lips are not fun to kiss. And this is serious because I like kissing. Also, as Napoleon Dynamite would say, "MY LIPS HURT REAL BAD!!" So I know there's this theory your lips can get ADDICTED to lip balm; I don't think that's the case with me because I haven't been using it much. Here are the products I have put on my lips the last 24 hours:

1) Boys Are Smelly Lip Jelly
2) Free DHL (yes, the express shipping company) chapstick from FBR (Phoenix) Open Golf Tournament
3) Body Shop Shea Lip Butter
4) Blistex Medicated Lip Balm

I also have this BOdy Shop thing that exfoliates lips, but it only seems marginally effective, so I haven't used it lately. My question is, in your opinion, should I continue a diligent regimen of slathering with various lip-moisturizing products, or should I wean myself off of them as soon as possible to allow my body to start replenishing the lips' moisture naturally? Your SURVEY QUESTION ANSWER via the comments tool can be as brief as one word: "slather" or "wean." Any other comments are welcome. Por ejemplo: Are there particular foods that would help? (besides butter, I know that would have an immediate effect.)

cold

The ice was thick on my car today; I was late down to the lake because of it. As I drove around the south bend of the lake, I hit some fog just as the DJ pronounced the words "patchy fog." Fortunately my running buddy also had to wrangle some ice and was similarly behind schedule, and we headed off. When it's dark and foggy, it's damn dark, I say. To our left, fog covered the edge of the lake and made everything to the left of the path just a faceless, lightless void. By the time we were around the loop, though, the sun was rising and the lake looked like glass. A good morning.

Shout out to my sister, who sent ME flowers even though it was SHE who has hit a double, with her new job and new apartment in the same week!! Love ya, sis. They are beautiful flowers and brighten my workday.

the biotch is back!

This just in: Phoenix was warm, sunny, gorgeous in its desertiness, and a bit unnerving and disorienting in its ceaseless strip mall. Ness. It's good for those of us who inhabit "rainy climates" with "dark, relatively cold winters" to take a hit off the sunshine pipe once in a while. I even turned, without any sunburn, a darker shade of white. But only myself and a few very close associates can even tell. Cuz I'm Winona Ryder in "Beetlejuice" pale baby. Ha CHA!

"Sex & The City" season 3 is on Comcast OnDemand, and I am enjoying it thoroughly, though heartbroken I didn't make it through the end of season 2 before they switched seasons. There are EVEN MORE episodes in Season 3 than in Season 2 so I am watching these 25 minute gems with a diligence I usually apply to ... well, the only thing I do very diligently is take my birth control pills and email at work! So a diligence currently unparalleled in my daily life! I am quilting at the same time, but can't muster the attention span to fold laundry. Which is too bad. Cause there's a lot of laundry about. Whomsoever stated that one should clean one's house before going on a trip was Righty McRighterson. The house is a complete disaster, with pre-trip mess plus Exploding Suitcases everywhere. I couldn't personally have implemented this pre-trip policy, of course, because I haven't reached that points in _Home Comforts_. I couldn't be bothered lastnight, and since I slept in and went to work LATE today, all I could do preparatory to the visit of Baseball Steve this morning was: move clean laundry from couch to our bed, put on fresh roll of TP, and remove bottle of Liquid Plumr (yeah, putting the m and e in that word totally would have broken the banks, guys, GOOD MOVE!) from bathroom floor.

OOOOOH!!! So we were in Phoenix, and we drove out to Glendale, which is now part of the greater Phoenix-Land Area, to go to a chocolate festival. There was fudge. And candied nuts. And truffles. I ate too much chocolate. I know, TOTALLY UNLIKE ME, right?!

And then we went to an antique store. And I saw a quilt. I really wish I could figure out how to post photos on here so I could show it to you ASAP. It's antique, PRETTY PEPPERMINT PINK, and gorgeous. I think the pattern is called "sunflower," it's like Dresden Plate but with pointy ends. It's from the 20's or 30's, by my estimation of the fabric designs. I am going to try to keep the secret of its purchase from my QuiltMaestra mother until she visits next month. The quilt caught my eye while I was still outside the door; it was folded in the bottom of an armoir. Then I saw it was $85. Eight-five dollars! This quilt is just gorgeous. I had never bought an antique quilt before, and it may be a questionable turning point, you know, this way lies madness, but once i opened it up, I knew it was coming home with me. I had no idea how I was going to fit it into my suitcase, but I knew it was mine. Despite saying this out loud the minute the quilt was open, I was able, at the urging of my savvy companion, to whittle ten dollars off the price. WhooPee! It has some holes in it, which I will repair, and one stain, but those Arizonans must not value the antique quilts. I think it would have been at least $175 in an antique mall in Oregon.

As it turns out, it is very useful to have a husband who travels with his golfclubs--that gigantic golf club bag bag ALWAYS has room for some extra stuff. The bag is gigantic. The first time he took it out to pack up the sticks, it was seriously freaking me out because you could fit a dead body in there.

this just in: yoga still fabulous

When I've been doing yoga regularly, my body just feels so good and pain-free. Not that it's normally wracked with pain, but it feels that way if I stop for a period of time. So so good. Lastnight during a rest between poses in floor series (when we are lying on our tummies, the instructor stepped on my feet (lying soles-up), giving me a sort of foot massage. It felt **heavenly**. Like this couldn't get any better?

Sorry if I'm boring you with yoga talk. It's a good thing; nuff said.

SUSSE: God, I was listening to the State of the Union speech and getting all riled up!...
ME: Would you take a shoe and hit yourself in the head with it?
SUSSE: No.
ME: Well, then why would you listen to the State of the Union speech?

understandable...understandable...

The songs in "Chicago" can really get in your head. Even if you haven't seen a film or stage version for months!

I finally watched the tape of last week's "O.C." which Madame A. kindly taped for me. (She tapes each episode, as previously noted, because of a standing conflict, but I still consider her loan of the tape to me as quite kind.) As it seems a bit stale at this point, I won't do a complete redux, just a list of observations and a favorite piece of dialogue:

-Those writers are good with the zingers. Zing!
-Lindsay's grating on my nerves.
-That heart necklace was tacky.
-I sense, or perhaps yearn for, a large story arc with the continuing deliciously macabre spiral of Miss Marissa, followed by slow and eventual wisdom earned dearly in the school of hard knocks. (OK, that wasn't quite an observation)
-Seth Cohen is really hot.
-Delighted to see Kim Delaney in the role of Rebecca. Could they have picked a more obvious dramatic/tragic name? Josh Schwartz has been hittin' the duMaurier.
-I'm also a bit protective of Kirsten and Sandy's relationship though, so I'm all, "back up on outta here, Rebecca!" Like we *ever* thought she was really dead? You don't waste that much buildup on a dead character.

SUMMER (to Zach and Seth, working on a comic): You guys are like Kavalier and Gay!
SETH: (heh heh heh) That's funny.
SUMMER (with attitude): I know!

MSH turned 33 yesterday. He's ma special boy. :)